You Are What You Nurture
There is a well known phrase: ‘you are what you eat.’ It’s a cute little statement about our diets, but it’s actually true on a couple different levels. Yes, if you eat bad food, you will have bad health. Junk food instead of healthy options. Soda and sugary drinks instead of water. The choices you make about what you consume directly affects your health. The clever little part of this idea, however, is that it applies to more than just food.
It also applies to the books you read, the pictures you see, the social media you consume, the news you hear, and the ideas you take in—regardless of where they come from. In fact, because all of this effects your mind and your thinking, its just as if not more important than your dietary choices.
If you do nothing but doom scroll you social media for hours each day, then that is the space that your mind will begin to live in. Studies have shown that if you are exposed to enough of the same or similar information, you will begin to believe it—regardless of whether or not it is true. If you are around negative people or find your self worth in a job that has you in a toxic work environment for 8 hours a day, then you will likewise grow a negative outlook on life, and have a higher likelihood of depression and anxiety. By that same process, if you consistently seek out calm and beauty, as corny as it may feel, your thinking will grow in the direction of calm and beauty.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
The logical process of eating junk food to produce junk health is pretty direct, intuitive, and easy to observe. When it comes to influencing the landscape of our minds, however, things are far more nuanced and most importantly they are under our control. Admittedly, it may be extremely difficult at times, but you have the ability to choose what you allow to influence you. If you have a mind, and it is working enough to enable you to find and read this blog, then you have the ability to make some choices. Viktor Frankl is famous for saying, “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.” And that’s where the idea of nurturing comes in. Because our minds are capable of analysis and choice we have the ability to choose how we react—not only to happens to and around us, but also to ourselves. Read that last sentence again. You have the ability to decide your reaction to what you experience. AND you have the ability to choose how you react to yourself.
This is all to say, that you can—and should—curate your thinking to create the life you want. Think about what you are taking in, and adjust to help promote your emotional landscape, your attention span, your learning, your growth. And most importantly, be mindful and consider what you are going to do with everything that you take in. Are you going to let the bad news that you just read to seep into the depths of your mind and poison the rest of your day or week? Or, are you going to learn how to choose a different path?
Investing in good habits and good health results in good growth.
It’s easier said than done. Ingrained ways of thinking and viewing the world can be very very difficult to shift and change—even if the changes you are looking to make will unequivocally improve your life. Thankfully, difficult is not the same as impossible, in fact it’s much the opposite. Difficult things, once accomplished, yield far better results.
Here’s some tips on how to make the shift…
1) Decide and commit to making some changes. I know that this step might seem presumed, and it’s a very easy to skim over it and keep on trucking to the more tangible tips, but this one is actually the most important. Give it some conscious thought. What would it mean to commit to making positive change in your life? What will you do on a daily basis to keep yourself on track in a caring and nonjudgmental way?
2) Limit your screen time. The irony of this is not lost on me—you’re reading this on a screen. You found this blog because of screens. Screens are how our society functions. Given all that, do yourself a favor, stop reading, turn off your phone, tablet, or computer, and go get some actual fresh air.
3) Because you didn’t follow the advice given in the 2nd tip, try going back and taking another stab at the 1st. ;)
4) Devote time at the end of each day for a gratitude practice. Review your day, pull the goodness out of it, and offer some gratitude.
5) Start a journaling practice. There is a massive amount of value in reviewing your life. On the daily—either in place of or in addition to a gratitude practice—take some time to review your day. As you do so, think about how you could have acted or reacted differently—in a way that helps you nurture what you want to nurture. The trick here is not to over-analyze or judge yourself harshly. This is likewise not an invitation to dwell on things you wish you could have changed. Curiosity is key here. Simply observe, question with kind curiosity, and steer yourself toward where you want to be.
6) Live mindfully. There are thousands of books, articles, and classes (like one of mine—pardon the shameless plug) about mindfulness. Have a search and give some practices a try. Greater mindfulness about what you are doing throughout your day will absolutely help you see the growth you are hoping to nurture.